Let's catch up on life, blog.

It's been a while. I've been in this apartment for....almost a month now. No complaints about the apartment itself. No REAL complains about life. Well, at least for this section of the blog.

Decided I'm going back to college maybe in the fall. But I'm on my own as far as that goes with financial aid. That's going to be awesome.

Made up with an ex. Became, actually, pretty good friends with said ex. That's all kinds of good.

Dogjaw is doing.......okay? I dunno. I feel like starting my own thing because I don't see Dogjaw as a touring band. As much as this is unfortunate........I'm not surprised. It's been pretty rad how many sweet shows we've played though. Not even going to try and lie about that. I've got to know a lot of really awesome people through playing said shows.

Now onto what in my life sucks right now, I guess.

Well, I started a job at ACS working for Aetna Medicare. Needless to say, I had to see something shitty coming. Working for a big corporation? Not really my thing. It was a full time job, though, and those are hard to come by anymore. So anyways, 2 days ago I am informed that "due to loss of work, we have to reduce hours." Hence meaning I get 20 hours a week now instead of my 40 that kept me on my feet. So that being said (provided something doesn't change), I can say byebye to:
-Staying in this apartment.
-NOT going back to work at Papa Joe's again.
-Going to college next fall.

My life is bangin', right? Not too mention my boss JUST got a raise. Isn't that some fucking shit?

So right now I have applications in at multiple places. Staples and a security job at the hospital to name 2. I have to meet someone tomorrow to turn in an application for a company that takes care of the mentally disabled. And, honestly, I hope I get it. It seems like such a fulfilling job and something that I would honestly enjoy. So, let's hope for the best?

Not to mention I heard something that I didn't need to hear at one of the most stressful points in my life. No fucking wonder I picked up smoking again.

I need to run. Somewhere. Get rid of all this real world bullshit and just live like a human should. Fuck. This.

Conversation between my girlfriend's father and I.

Todd
"Hey fucker. I bought you some more condoms."
Me
"Oh, awesome. Thanks."
Todd
"Yeah, go screw yourself."


I'm obviously going to enjoy living in this new apartment.

You know, for the most part, days off aren't all that great.

I have had the WHOLE day off today. For a while, it wasn't too bad. Got the 360 hooked back up, and discovered some decent music I guess. Besides that, though, I got nothing accomplished. Not only that, but the day actually wasn't that fantastic. Mom and I got into a huge argument and I ran off for a few hours to Jim's. That was okay, I guess, but now I'm just bored as all hell back at the house now. I'll probably end up doing some reading and then calling it an early night, I guess.

Hopefully, soon, I'm getting my motorcycle. Then sometime within the next few months buying a bike off my friend Jordan. I'm........extremely stoked about that.

I start my new job at ACS on Monday. So happy about that. Still working at Papa Joe's, but only for about 1 or 2 days a week. Hopefully. I dunno. If it sucks too bad then I'll just quit there.

Megan and I move into our new apartment in about 2 weeks if all goes as planned. I can't even begin to say how excited I am for this. 'nuff said.

Megan and I are also going to Keyser game on Friday. She wants to go see the pit crew, whom she sorta worked with over the summer. Apparently I'm being introduced? For some odd reason I'm excited about it. Never have I had a girlfriend who wanted to introduce me to people. It's extremely sweet, I think.

Dogjaw is progressing extremely well. We've moved on and changed a few things around. I play bass and sing now, which I'm satisfied with. I'm psyched about Jim playing guitar now. Not only that, but we're sort of getting out there. I mean, we're potentially playing a show with Cobra Skulls and Dead To Me at some point in the future maybe. Not only that, but planning a tour? Oh, and we're about to release our first album. AND we have enough songs for 2 more albums. Who knows where this will go?

The future looks extremely promising right now for me, and I'm extremely happy with how things are going. I'm happy I didn't get to Shepherd now, because I would've lost out on so much.

Yeah, man. I'm digging my lifestyle choices right now. Until now, after exploring the job market, I've always thought you had to have a college degree to get ANYWHERE. Thank god you don't. I'd be FUCKED. I probably won't ever go to college. Hopefully, that is. I'd like to make a living without it.

OH! Almost forgot this! Megan and I might be going to Disney World this winter! I'm actually extremely stoked about that. I'm just excited to see her get insanely happy about it, you know? The girl talks about it all the time in such an amazing manner that I can't even begin to describe how I think she'll be when we actually get there. We can afford it too. It's a possibility. A good one.

This girl, dude. That's all that needs to be said.

Pedro The Lion just makes everything intensely worse by about 10 fold.

Things were great. Megan and I had everything settled, and I for real had no real problems that were anything of utmost importance. Now everything has just fucked me over. Megan and I are still together, but a lot of shit came up and now her parents are pissed about how much time we've been spending together, and she's grounded. I feel awful. I feel as if I uprooted her from somewhere she was content. As much as she tells me that I played no part in her coming home from WVU, I can't help but think I possibly was. As shallow and cocky as that sounds, I just can't help myself from thinking that. Not to mention that she wrecked her car. Thank god she wasn't hurt. She could've died. I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself. She drove home to see me and I'm putting every little bit of what is happening right now on myself. Her parents are extremely upset with her because she failed to tell them that she wrecked because they weren't in the best mood. This is just all my fault. No way around it.

One of my best friends in the whole world no longer talks to me. She's obviously upset that I'm with Megan. I've tried talking to her. Hell, we even hung out when she was back in town, but it just wasn't the same. I feel like when I do try to talk to her, I get nothing out of her and she's just pissed off with me. I've since just stopped talking to her. She's in a place where she's so much happier, and I'm happy for her. She's seizing the opportunity that I couldn't, and I'm happy for her. I'm just so upset about her completely hating me. Her also successfully causing another one of my friends (who is also one of her friends) to potentially hate me has also been quite a stress. As much as I've texted this person, I've gotten nothing. To know that I've laughed my ass off with these people and now they're total strangers is just so disconcerting to me that I can't even handle it.

I have no idea what I've done, or any idea how to fix it, but I just want things to go back to being okay. I want Megan and I just to move into this apartment, problem free, and have things finally settled for once in my fucking life.

Dad and I are going job rooting tomorrow for me. I'm potentially joining the Carpenter's Union. Not where I saw myself at all back in high school, but I do sort of enjoy that kind of thing. Maybe that's a positive side. I don't know.

Life needs to get back to being on track. I want to be content for once.

Finding my wife, FTW.

What?

Life's good.

My band just got finished our first album. I'm quite satisfied.

I have a new job that I will, most likely, get. It pays quite well, but I'm not sure if I want it because I like how my current job is lax with shows and stuff. I mean, I could always just grab more hours there. No big deal, I guess.

So, yeah. Sort of went up to Morgantown to hang out with someone. Basically had a blast. Hung out with an old friend. We went to Cooper's Rock, went to Cheddar's to eat, and just sort of hung out around her apartment. Watching Neverending Story with her was damn hysterical. Most fun I've had in quite a while. So, we're watching this movie and she non-nonchalantly sets her head on my shoulder. I'll just say that it was one of those things that sort of made everything better. I mean, I obviously have feelings for this girl, so it was just.....yeah. It made me happy. During the whole thing we were sort of getting closer and closer to each other. I mean, I was doing it on purpose. I don't know. We finally end up just sort of chilling out and watching YouTube videos. Really close together, might I add. Somehow I end up holding her hand, and eventually we go to bed and we're sort of cuddling. I mean, not sort of, but we ARE. I couldn't even believe it, to be honest. Eventually we just end up kissing. I don't know how it happened, but it just did. It was amazing. In review, I showed up there having feelings for this girl, nothing enormous, sort of just a silly crush I guess. But I left feeling so much different. In a great way, that is. Like, we just clicked. There's no other way to explain it. I THINK she feels the same way about me. THINK. Even looking at how our conversations go through text messages, it just sort of seems like it. I don't know how to bring it up with her! Sure, she lives an hour and a half away, but the distance doesn't matter. Not anymore it doesn't. Besides, she deserves a good guy. I'm not trying to brag, but I think I'm a pretty decent person. It seems like she's had a lot of guys that were dicks to her, and that just sets me off because she deserves so much better. I wanna give that to her. Ya digg? Hopefully it works out. I couldn't take another one of those "spur of the moment" bits.

Peace.

MAN!

Life got REALLY great all of a sudden. Like, for real! I started talking to a long lost friend again, who now lives in Morgantown, and I have plans to go visit with her maybe next week! We're sharing new music and such, so it's cool that we've started talking again. Not to mention.....well...nevermind. :). Haha.

My job is going well, except for the fact that we had a bunch of dickheads come in today, but oh well. That's Fort fuckin' Ashby for you.

I'm really happy with where Dogjaw is going. Potentially playing a show with Dead To Me is overwhelming. I wanna try and plan out a tour. I'm sad that Tim is leaving us for a while, but he'll still play with us over breaks and such when he's home. If the music scene around here starts growing even more I just may stay around here after all.

Dad got a job in North Carolina working for my Grandad. He won't be home much, but hey, it's a job. I'm not as beat up about it as Mom and my sisters are. I mean, we'll still be communicating. Plus it could be a whole lot worse.

I'm havin' my birthday party next week! I really don't wanna have one, but what the fuck ever. Mom wants me to have one so I guess I should.

I guess that's all for now!

PS. She's a cutie.